VALIANT
by XOdannieXO
Summary: Being one of Erudite's high-end elites, has it perks; but with perks, there are detriments to accompany. Feeling rather unsatisfied with her current occupation, Juliana wants to have more. With the pre-programmed curiosity of a true Erudite, she decided to leave everything behind and start from scratch; in hopes that she will be granted a piece of long dreamed freedom.
1. Chapter 1

''_There she goes again.''_

''_Look at her trying to kill herself ones again.''_

''_When will this poor child finally learn?''_

_People break into furious whisper, as I adjust the synthetic wings attached to my back. Spreading my arms, I feel the air circling around me, whipping my long hair from one site to the other. A smile reaches my face, my teeth shining bright while I stand on the garage of our two-story home. _

_I have woken early just to catch the breathtaking view of the sun very first rays hitting the concrete jungle we call our home. People have started to look from their windows, some even gathering in front of my house to watch what I was going to do. _

''_Get off the roof, sweet Juliana!'' I hear someone shout from somewhere below. My eyes open and I look at the grey headed woman. Her equally grey eyes look up, squinting to avoid her eyes from burning. With one hand on her hips she gives me a stern look before waving a finger at me. ''You get down here this instance, young lady. And don't you dare argue with me.''_

_A smile smirk creeps its way onto my face. If she wants me off this roof so badly, I am pleased to give her just that. With a nice clear of the throat I raise both my arms and start to bend my knees. Now just keep remembering what you've read in the book, Juliana; 'keep your muscles as tight as possible and flap your arms as shown in the pictures below'. _

''_Juliana, now!'' Her screaming becomes louder as I prepare myself._

_My eyes close once again, before I take a step closer. The summer breeze whips through my hair once more time and then I do it. I bend my knees and push forward. Pure ecstasy rushes through my veins, while my body lunges forward in the air. Feeling weightless, almost as light as a feather, I begin to flap my arms, imagining that I am gliding with the wind. People start screaming, gasping my name as my arms move up and down. My smile enlarges. I must have done it! I must really be flying with the wind. With a grin on my face I open my eyes to see how far up I have managed to get. But instead of enjoying my victory and praising myself in the loud cheering of my name, I begin to scream. Instead of reaching even higher for the moon and the stars, I fear for my life. The ground beneath me is coming closer with each second that passes. I realize why; I am not flying. I am not now and I will never be able to fly. An ear piercing scream I stuck in my throat as I begin to realize that I am falling. Soon my body will meet the cold ground and I am left to die. Maybe I will be lucky and I will die fast, without any pain. Knowing myself, I know that it will be as painful as it can get. _

''_Got you!'' A man screams while I land in his arms. _

_The people around us start to cheer. They scream his name- his and not mine. My eyes close and I wish that he hadn't caught me. This wasn't his moment of glory. It was supposed to be mine! He just had to ruin it for me!_

''_Juliana!'' I hear someone call my name. ''You foolish girl! What have I told you about trying dangerous stunts?'' I keep my eyes closed to avoid talking to her. Maybe if I ignore her long enough, she will just walk away and leave me be. ''I am talking to you, Juliana. You will respect your elders and answer them if you are directly talked to. Do you understand, young lady?''_

_I don't need to open my eyes to know that she was angry at me. I don't need to open my eyes to also know that the vein on her forehead is vibrating as the heavy breaths leave her timid body. _

''_Yes, grandma. I do understand.''_

''_Good!'' She claims, furiously ripping me from my savior's arms. ''Now come!'' Grandma drags me into the house and into the basement where she locks the door before we proceed to walk down the stairs. I already know what is going to happen now. Once we walk down these very stairs, grandma will pull out the chair to suit herself. After that she will beckon me forward until I lay on her lap, my buttocks bare of any clothing. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! TEN! FIFTEEN! And then it ends. In my prior life it had only been her hand that she used to sanction me with. But as I grew older, she thought that her hand isn't enough. Now, each time I do something stupid, considered in her eyes, I meet the wrath of her wooden board. I used to be afraid of the basement, knowing that whenever grandma wanted me to go down there with her that she would sanction me. But as time passes you get used to the pain. The stinging is only a minor point in the moment and you just count down the amount of time she has already hit you._

_Grandma forces my skirt down before she sits and mentions me to lean over her lap. If only I could enjoy the warmth that it is giving me at times like these. Knowing what is about to happen I cannot do that. Now will I ever be able to enjoy her warmth, when the only think I can think of when I see her, is how she beats my behind until it is red; almost bleeding from the severe damage she had done. _

'_This is for your own good' she tells me. But I find it hard to believe her. Having her stand at my back, encouraging me to reach for the stars and accomplish my dreams, would be good for me. Instead she does the exact opposite. Her wooden board hits my bare skin. I cringe. The first hit is always the worst-_

''Miss Winters.'' Someone mentions my name. ''Do you know the answer to my question?''

My eyes travel around the class, moving over each head as I try to remember what his question was. Seeing as I didn't think to pay attention I am not able to answer him. And the bald man in front of me knows that as well. His thin lips pull into a line as he shakes his head.

''What a pity, Miss Winters.'' With another shake of his head, he walks back to his desk to write something down. After he finishes he readjusts the rectangular glasses on his rather large nose and looks back up. ''Is someone else able to answer my question? Yes Miss Ray, please!''

''James Walter was one of the founders of this city. In early 1800 he and four other pioneers pilgrimmed from the south, searching for a new location where their families were able reproduce after The Great War. It is also said that Walter was the one who came up with the differentiation of our kind, choosing that we should live in factions, which we know are still intact to this very day.''

''Very good, Miss Ray. And does anyone know, in which faction, Sir James Walter chose to live?'' His head moves from one part of the room to the other. From the corner of my eye, I notice Summer's hand shooting up, trying to prove that she knows the answer. ''Miss Winters, another chance maybe?''

His tone might have been implying sympathy but I know that behind his calm and pitying exterior, he is judging me; taking every chance he gets to embarrass me in front of the entire class because I was too busy daydreaming.

''Abnegation, sir-''

''And do you happen to know why, Miss Winters?''

''After having fought in The Great War, Sir James Walter decided that the outrages act of selfishness was the main cause for the war to break out in the first place. Some disagreed with him, claiming that not selfishness was the problem but the mere act of vanity, cowardice, anger, and deception. But even through the times of doubt, he kept believing in his own words and didn't let anyone bring him down. He found several others, which agreed with him and soon founded the faction we now all know as Abnegation.'' I recite from one of the essays I had written before.

''Fantastic, Miss Winters.'' The teacher claps his hands together as the bell rings, signaling that the class has ended. ''Now, at home I want you to read about the Choosing Ceremony and its Aptitude Test. Make sure to write the most important aspects down.''

Throwing the books into my bag, I begin to walk out of the room. I walk down the halls, seeing every color of our faction combining into one mess of blue, black, white, yellow, red, black and grey.

''There you are. I have been looking for you everywhere.''

''You know I have Faction History on Mondays.''

''Oh yeah I forgot. Sorry.''

I wrap Judie into a one armed hug before we proceed to walk towards our lockers. Every Monday my day starts off with two periods of Faction History before she and I have a small break. We usually spend that time in the library, like any other Erudite would. I honestly think that no one of us has been down in the cafeteria after their first day here.

''So how did it go?'' Judie asks, while turning her lock to open the small cubicle.

''You know exactly how it went!''

''Right, I can totally see you sitting in that disturbing yellow chair, your chin in your palm looking out of the windows, dying to get a chance to jump off of moving trains or climb any high buildings.'' Rolling my eyes I turn the wheel on my own lock.

''You know exactly that I wasn't thinking of that.''

''But it so was.'' She argues. In all the years I have known Judie now, I have never told her about the daily punishment I would receive from my grandmother. I know that her being my best friend meant that I should be able to tell her, but something within just kept me from doing so. Maybe I was scared that she would look at me in a different way; such as everyone else does when they hear my name.

''I can't believe it. In about a week's time I will finally be able to attend the Choosing Ceremony. I am so excited, I don't know what to do with myself.''

''Maybe you should try to calm down first.'' I place my hands on her forearms. ''The Choosing Ceremony is nothing special.''

After taking the books I need, I close the locker and turn to face my best friend.

''Do you have anything special in mind, what you want to do today?'' I ask, stuffing the books into my over packed bag.

''I thought that maybe we could run down to the café and get something nice to drink.'' Nodding, I follow her lead.

''So do you have any idea on what you will decide when it is your turn?'' She asks as we walk down the streets, the sun high in the sky. I shake my head at her. ''You will probably choose to stay in Erudite. You have a nice job that anyone would kill for; and not to mention that Jeanine Matthews herself chose you. I on the other hand think that I will leave all this behind.''

We enter through the doors. A few other students linger in the seats as I let my gaze wander around the small café at the end of the street. Some wear black and white, some red and yellow; the colors of all factions combined in one, just like in school.

''Don't tell anyone.'' She remarks after we have taken our seats. ''but I think I will change factions.''

My eyes widen at her words. It is usual for a few sixteen year old to change their factions. But never did I think that Judie would be one of them. She has always been the kind to avoid new things.

''Are you sure, Jude?''

''Positive.''

''And do you know where you want to go-'' We fall silent as we notice the waiter approaching.

Wiping his hands on the yellow apron, he fishes out his notebook and a small pen to take our orders. His smile is friendly and happiness reaches his dark eyes when he gets closer.

''Have you two decided what you want to order?'' He asks us. His voice is surprisingly smooth, calming my nerves as I close my eyes to listen.

''I'll have a coffee, please.'' The waiter nods his head and proceeds to scribble Judie's order down. After that he turns to face me, another smile appearing on his face.

''What can I get you?''

''A tea, please.''

''Is there any specific kind you want to have?''

''Camomile is fine.''

With another smile he writes my order down and excuses himself, assuring that our drinks would be right up. As soon as he is out of hearing range, I turn back to Judie.

''Again, do you know where you want to go?''

''Anywhere is fine, Julie.'' She says, picking at the table cloth. ''Anywhere but here.'' Her voice turns light as her eyes glaze over. Sometimes I thought off her being left out of the community because she befriended me. I am the girl that is too curious for her own good. I jump off roofs to prove people that I am capable of accomplishing something. People catch me daydreaming most of the time, knowing that I am easily distracted; something the Erudites do not appreciate.

''And I think you know that you also have to leave.'' Her voice is barely but a whisper. ''You are not an Erudite, Julie. You may be smart enough for this but we all know that seeking wisdom in books is not for you.''

The waiter arrives with our drinks. Setting them down, he gives us both a smile before vanishing behind the counter again.

''Why does this awfully sound like a goodbye?''

''Because it is.'' Her eyes begin to tear up. ''We both knew that this day would come. And now it has.'' She sips her coffee before she sets the mug down again. Before leaving the café she comes to my side to kiss my cheek.

''Be wise, Juliana.'' With that she is out the door and probably out of my life. I stay and stare at the mug in my hands. The heat burns under my touch but I don't pull away. Deeply focused on the mug I don't notice the waiter coming to my side again. Only when his hand touches my shoulder, I jump in seat.

''Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you like that.''

I shake my head. ''It's okay.''

''Is everything okay with you and your friend?''

My eyes furrow at his blatant behavior. Usually people would approach me with more care. But not this guy.

''Yeah, everything's fine.''

''Are you sure about that.'' Before asking for my allowance, he suits himself on the opposite site of the table. With his hands placed on the table, he looks me up and down. ''You don't look like it.''

Shaking my head, I take a deep breath. ''I'm terribly sorry, but do I know you somehow?'' Before he gets his chance to answer me, I hear someone calling for his attendance. The boy in front of me excuses himself and walks away. Sighing, I pay the beverages and walk out of the café.

Later that day when I am dressing for my job, I still have Judie's words lingering in my ears. I know I shouldn't put my mind too far into it but I am certain that Judie tried to tell me something with her words.

''Miss Winter, Ms. Matthews is calling for you.''

Straightening out the black pencil skirt I walk out the room and towards Jeanine Matthews' office. Once I stand in front of I consider knocking, but as I reach forward to do so, I hear a sudden voice beckoning me inside.

''You have called for me, Ms. Matthews?''

''Yes, Juliana.'' The blond woman doesn't spare me a glance as she furiously types away on her keyboard. Long fingers move over the keys as she addresses me. ''Please go again and file a few things for me, will you dear?'' She mentions to a pile of paper work before she continues with her own work.

Barely smiling I walk forward to get the mess of files. This is my so called job; the job that everyone would die for. All day long I sit in the office, which is connected to Jeanine's and file her stuff. Now as fun as it sounds I can't see why people envied me for this.

''Of course, Ms. Matthews.''

Without further ado I walk back to my place and sit in my chair. Setting the files onto the glass table, I place my head in my hands and sigh. While rubbing my eyes I can already imagine how much fun I will be having, going through endless amounts of paperwork.

''Could you please visit my office, Miss Winters?'' I hear Jeanine speak through the receiver on my table.

''Of course, Ms. Matthews.'' I speak into the device after pushing the green button.

Walking into her office, I can see Jeanine walking around the room, searching for things that she pushes into her purse. Her blond hair is chaotic, probably from her running her hands through it. I stand at the entrance, waiting for her to address me before I make my next move.

''Ms. Matthews?'' I knock on the door causing her to look up. Her head snaps up and I can see her relax as her gaze meets mine.

''Miss Winters-'' she addresses me. ''Please do me a favor and print the document I have opened on my computer. After you have done that please be a dear and bring it to Mr. Coulter. I would have done it myself but unfortunately something has changed my course of plans.''

''Of course, Ms. Matthews.'' And just like that she disappears.

After printing out her work, I put it into one of the brown folders before making my way to leave. Mr. Coulter is Jeanine's right hand. If she ever had a problem, Mr. Coulter is the first one she will go to. Knocking on his office door, I wait until he calls me inside.

''Come in.'' I open the door after he calls me in.

''Ah Miss Winters,'' he greets me. His blond hair I neatly combed, his attire matching his position in this compound. ''How are you this fine day, Miss Winters?''

''Hello sir.'' I greet him back, a smile overtaking my face. ''I'm fine. And how are you doing?''

His own smile overtakes his lips. ''I feel fine, thank you for asking, dear. Now, I take it, these are the files that Jeanine has given you?'' He motions his pen to the paper in my arms.

''Of course.'' I hand them over after I have walked over to his desk.

Just like mine and any other desk in this compound, his is made of clear glass. But instead of endless amounts of paperwork he has a few pictures on his desk. I look over them. On one of them I can see a woman, smiling brightly into the camera, her dark hair shining in the sun. On another one I see Mr. Coulter himself, his wife holding their child in her arms. Next to that I see a young man; probably their son. Everyone that looked at him can't deny the resemblance he carries to his father.

''He looks just like me, does he not?''

I feel myself blush at the thought that he has caught me staring at the pictures of his family. Hiding behind my hair I try to cover my reddened cheeks. I nod but don't say anything.

''But he is a troublemaker I can tell you that, dear.'' He sighs. ''I cannot figure out where that came from.'' He shakes his head and smiles, obviously cherishing the memory of a prior event.

''I better get going, Mr. Coulter. I was only meant to bring you the files.''

''Thank you dear.'' He smiles at me. ''If you have any questions, don't be afraid to give me a call and ask. I will always be there to help you out.''

Nodding my head, I walk out and back into Jeanine's office. A sigh leaves my mouth, knowing that this day would be long. Maybe if I pretend that I am doing something that makes fun, time will pass faster.


	2. Chapter 2

''Choose!'' It says, the sound echoing from one site of the wall to the other.

What _It_ is? I don't know. It could be almost everything, for all I knew. But it sounds like a human voice, only that it doesn't sound human at all. I know it doesn't make much sense. I move around the room, choosing not to listen to the strange voice.

''Choose!'' This time it is louder, jarring as it is forcing me to decide on something. But what I had to decide on, I don't know. The voice- or whatever the hell this thing is- just won't tell me.

''God damn it.'' I scream, trying to overpower the voice's volume. ''I cannot decide on something I don't see. And you screaming at me isn't helping me at all.''

The room goes silent, almost immediately as I stand in it. The once dark walls become clear, blinding as I try to shield my eyes from the bright light. Stones turn glassy until I see them slowly reflect each other in themselves.

''What the-'' My voice is barely but a whisper as I try to figure out what is happening here.

Walls turn into mirrors, each mirror reflecting another, until the illusion of infinity is created. My body whirls around, wanting to escape the sudden maze. But to no use. I am stuck in here until the end; there is nothing I can do against it.

''Choose.'' This time I can see what the voice is- or rather who it is.

Big, green eyes look back at me, fierce as they try to look me down. The eyes belong to a much familiar face. I let my glare wander up and down her body before I stop on her face again. Her clothing tells me she is from Erudite. I would have known as much, without having to know her. But if I didn't know her, which would be the only thing I would know. And my thirst for knowledge would make me want to get to know her. But that is the problem. Just as everyone else, I wouldn't want to meet her; if it wasn't for the tiny fact that the girl looking right back at me is, indeed no one else but me.

''You're a smart one, they say.'' Her lips pull into a small smile, as if to taunt me, knowing that is one of the words they call me here. ''You will figure out what to choose, one way or another. Say how does it feel, to be left alone in this world, knowing that no one will ever understand the potential you carry around with you? It is quite a pity, if you ask me. Such as sharp mind, which everyone sees past because of the shenanigans you are causing. Choose, Juliana; and most importantly, be wise!''

Before I can mutter but a word, the reflection of a much darker version of myself vanishes and I am left with the sudden appearance of two bowls in front of me. One holds a piece of meat, raw and bloody. My stomach turns and twists as I stare at the piece of freshly cut flesh in the silver holding. The other bowl, I notice, beholds a knife. The blade reflects the light as I turn to look at it from different angles. It is simple; most likely to be used for anything but artistic purposes. Hearing the faint whisper of my own voice telling me to choose one of the belongings, I decide to take the knife into my hands. I turn and twist it again, feeling the leather grip rubbing against my hands. I run a finger along the blade, hissing as the sharpness pierces my skin, drawing blood.

My sharp intake of breath echoes around the mirrors, as the drops of blood splatter onto the floor. As they leave behind a faint melody, I hear whimpers reach my ears. I don't have to look around to see what it is. The puppy sits close by, licking at its paws, covered by the same red liquid that had just dropped onto the floor.

''Puppy!'' I hear the voice of a young girl scream. Looking around, I see the innocent face of my younger self longingly looking at the canine, clapping her hands. ''Puppy!'' she screams again, ready to run forward.

The dog barks, warning her to get any closer before it would leap forward and bite her. It becomes larger in size, changing its appearance as my younger self runs forward to give it a hug. At the same time I can hear myself scream out for her, telling her to stop before anything happens to her. But knowing how headstrong I had been at my younger ages, I am not surprised to her not reacting to my pleading. Only now do I realize what trouble I have been causing my grandmother, all these years.

''Stop.'' My body acts before I can help it.

I jump forward, the knife firmly grasped in my hands. My body collides with the dog's before we both roll on the floor, stopping inches in front of the young girl's feet. The knife in my hand pierces through its skin, the animal going limp in my arms in merely a second. I try not to recoil at the stench of its blood, but I cringe as I hear the girl begin to scream. She is throwing profanities and I am left to listen as the world around me becomes black again. Only second later, I find myself in the steel chair, I have been placed on before all of this even started.

My body I covered in a fine layer of sweat, my heartbeat racing and my lungs furiously filling with lungs, trying to calm myself down. The woman, who had strapped me onto the chair, clears her throat making me turn towards her.

Just as before, her blond hair is spiked into a professional yet wild hair do. She reads something off her clipboard before she turns towards me.

''I am very lucky to present you your test results.'' She smiles at me.

''I hope they are good ones.'' I try to muster a smile but I seem to lack the strength to pull the small muscles in my face.

''It's okay.'' She says while moving towards me. ''A lot of people feel like you, after their Aptitude Test. You might feel a little dizzy in the next few hours, so I suggest you take it slow and not do anything too crazy.'' Her face holds amusement as she silently laughs about her last statement. It is probably an inside joke she has with her friends, which I wouldn't understand. ''If you want to, I can let you leave early, claiming that you had to leave because of a bad stomach?''

Not knowing how to answer that, I give my head a nod. We stay quiet for a while. Whereas I do not know what to do, she begins to grasp the thick leather bands in her hands.

''My test results?'' I ask when she is finished unstrapping me.

I seem to have caught her off guard; for she looks at me for a second before she finally looks down onto her notes. Clearing her throat, she flips through the single pages, checking if my results are correct.

''Dauntless.'' She smiles brightly.

Looking at her clothes and hair I can see why. The girl herself is from Dauntless, at least she looked like it to me. I would bet that she has some tattoos covering her body.

''You're Dauntless, yourself.'' I state, rather than ask.

''Why yes I am.'' For someone who is jumping on and off trains the entire day, she sure sounds chipper. Too chipper for someone like that, if you ask me. ''I'm Tris, by the way.'' She smiled at me, again.

''Do all Dauntless smile so much?''

She belts out a melodious laughter, going back to the computer.

''No.'' She shakes her head. ''I guess it is just me that is smiling all the time. Cracking jokes when it is everything but appropriate.''

''I am…'' I cut myself off, not sure whether I should tell the girl my name or not. But then again, she has called me in. She should know my name, by now. ''Juliana.''

Tris nods her head, while I stand to get ready to leave. Once I stand, I adjust the clothes on my body before I turn to leave the testing room.

''I will see you at the Choosing Ceremony!'' I hear Tris call behind me, before the door to the room closes, enclosing the girl within.

''shouldn't you be at school, Juliana?'' I hear the deep voice of Mr. Coulter asking me, as I make my way towards my office. ''Or at least at school?''

Stopping in my tracks, I turn around to look at the blond man. Wearing his usual white coat, he gives me wide grin before mentioning me to follow him.

''I know, sir.'' I begin, walking close behind. ''But I wasn't feeling well, so they let me leave earlier than the others; not wanting to face any inconveniences of course, if something were to happen to me.''

Mr. Coulter nods his head before we reach his office. Walking inside he throws his bag onto his desk before vanishing behind one of the many doors in this room.

''Is there a reason for you to order me here?''

It takes him a while before he answers me.

''Actually-'' he begins. ''There is. If you could, I would like you to file these papers and then bring them back to Jeanine. And when you're you are finished you may come back and we will enjoy a nice cup of coffee. How does that sound?''

I smile at the older man, before reaching to grasps the files in his outstretched his hands.

''I know we aren't really allowed to talk about your test results.'' Mr. Coulter begins, once again. ''But I am quite curious of your results, if I might say so myself. Are they what I think they are, or will you surprise us.'' The smile on his face reaches his eyes. ''as usual.'' He adds later, his grin only growing as he hands me another stack of papers.

''That depends.'' I state as I shuffle the files together, almost finished with the task.

''And what would that be, Miss Winters?''

''It depends on what you think, which faction is most fitting for me.''

The man in the white coat, leans back in his chair and crosses his arms behind his head. His glare turns to the side as if in deep thought. For a second I believe that he has dosed off and forgotten me in his office. But it is when he smiles that I am reminded of his childish antics. Rubbing his short beard, his gaze focuses on me again.

''Hmm, I've always thought you a bit of an Amity, if I am honest with you.'' He suggests.

Furrowing my brows in displeasure I stare at him, only to have him break into a joyful round of laughter. Even minutes later, when I have finished my assignment, he still holds his almost non existing belly trying to contain his laughter.

''Oh dear lord.'' He exclaims. ''Imagine you-'' he begins to laugh, again. ''In Amity. You would be high on that peace serum, I will tell you that.'' Mr. Coulter's hands move to cover his cheeks, as if horrified at the thought of me being high on something.

''No.'' He shakes his head, his voice void of any amusement he held only seconds ago. He stands up to sit down next to me and take my small hand into his much larger one. ''You, my child, are so full of energy- so full of life. As much as the Amity like to sing and dance with each other, it is most definitely not a life for someone like you.'' He gives my hand a small squeeze.

''There is so much more to a person's character than the human eye can see. Most people do not try hard enough to look further behind that barrier that separates us from who we truly are. I am very glad that I have tried to look past your barrier and very much succeeded at doing so. I am very proud of myself for that, if I say so myself.''

I look at the man in confusion.

''You are a strong girl, Juliana. You do not fear to chase down your dreams and wishes. You will stop at absolutely nothing to achieve your goals. And that is what I admire in you. I have seen the way you have grown up. People would stop and stare at you; even laugh at you because you weren't afraid to try new things; even if that meant to break a few bones here and there.'' At this we both break into laughter.

''You are much stronger than you think you are, Juliana.''

''Thank you.'' I fear the words to be barely audible, as my throat threatens to close in on me while the tears gather in my eyes.

''Now tell me.'' He begins, once again. ''Did you get what I think you got?''

Not knowing what to say I nod my head at smile at the older man. For as long as I can remember, Mr. Coulter has been right behind me; always ready to help me when I needed him, always there to look over my shoulder and correct me when I did something wrong. He is just one of those people that you cannot get mad at, no matter how hard you try. He will always be there to make you laugh.

''Now how about you bring those files to Jeanine and then you come right back for that coffee!'' His tone is hard but his eyes tell me his true intentions. Smiling, I nod my head and walk towards my new destination.

I knock on her door, before I wait for Jeanine to call me inside. When I don't hear herm I knock again, thinking that maybe she hadn't heard me. When she doesn't bid me inside, I knock a third time just to be ignored, once again. The door knob is cold when I twist it. Opening the door I see that the room inside is empty. It looks like Jeanine didn't even come here. With furrowed brows, I set the papers on her desk and then proceed to walk out. Closing the door behind me I shake my head, wondering why she didn't come to work, today.

''Did you happen to know, why Jeanine is ill, this morning?'' I ask Caleb Prior, when I pass him in the halls. Last year, when Caleb transferred from Abnegation, Jeanine took a liking in him. Of course when he came, I had lost my job as her assistant and was assigned to Mr. Coulter.

''Yes, I certainly would.'' Caleb hasn't been the same, for quite the time now. At first he had been quiet, only being by his lone some; giving the impression that he wanted to be alone. We Erudites respected his wishes. But then something clicked within his brain. He suddenly was this new person. His friendly demeanor turned slightly arrogant; almost as if he thought too highly of himself. I guess that was the influence that Jeanine Matthews had on you, when you work with her each minute of the year. ''She had to attend some personal business. But why would you care?''

''I had to bring her the designated files for her appointment on three o'clock, this day.'' I cross my arms over my chest. ''I hope you didn't forget that, Caleb.'' His eyes go wide as I remind him of the appointment. ''What would Jeanine think, if she heard of this!''

''I think she would be able to see past it. Unlike you, I matter to Jeanine.''

''Why don't you go ahead and shut it, Caleb? No one around here cares about you. This may sound harsh now but Jeanine is one of them.''

''You're lying.'' Caleb states. ''I am very important to Jeanine.''

''Are you now?'' I ask, my brows rising. ''Just remember that I had been her personal assistant, as well Caleb. People would tell me that I had a job to die for. But look at me now. Jeanine has obviously found someone more fitting for the job than I could ever be. But what happens when she eventually finds someone who is even more fitting than you?'' Caleb doesn't answer me. His eyes are kept wide as he looks down on me. ''You will be gone in a matter of seconds. No job and no Jeanine for you. You will eventually realize how much you matter to Jeanine Matthews. Don't come running and tell me that I did not warn you, when it will eventually happens.''

With that I spin on my heels and begin to walk back towards Mr. Coulter's office, ready to take him up on that cup of coffee. But as I proceed to knock on his door, I am met by the man himself. Seeming to be in a rush, he oversees my frame and almost runs into me.

''Is everything alright, sir?''

''I almost did not see you there, Juliana.'' He says as we bent down to collect the papers that have fallen from his hands. ''I have been called into an emergency meeting. I must apologize and must ask you to come another time for that cup of coffee.'' He sheepishly smiles at me, hoping that I wouldn't be too mad at him.

''It is more than okay, sir.'' I assure him. '' You go attend that meeting. We will catch up another time.''

We smile at each other and I am left to watch his back become smaller as he runs into the distance. When I see him turn a corner I decide to collect my stuff from my office and head. The streets in Erudite are buzzing with life as I make my way home. The blue color of our clothing makes us seem like one bitch splatter of color on a canvas; each of us moving into different directions, each wanting to get somewhere else. The walk from the Head Quarters to my home isn't really long but sometimes it feels like I am walking for ages. Once I finally see the white house in the distance, I begin to run. The adrenaline in my body rushes through my system, igniting a new level of energy as I pick up speed. I spread my arms out, imaging that I was flying, the hair whipping my hair as I am high above the ground.

''Take those arms down, silly girl.'' I hear the shrill voice of my grandmother complain.

''Leave me be, grandma.'' I try to argue back.

I see her standing in front of one of the many windows in our home. She leans out as she chastises me, her wooden spoon waving in the air, mocking my behind. Immediately I feel my back stiffen up as I see the wooden object wave in her frail yet strong hands.

''Come on inside.'' She says. ''I have finished lunch.''

Together we sit at the table. Grandma has made my favorite. But as I look down at the piece of chicken, I must come to the realization that I am not as hungry as I thought I would be, once I come home. I sigh as I begin to move the meal on my plate around.

''Is something wrong, child?'' I hear grandma ask.

''Nothing.'' I mumble. But on a second chance I decide to tell her what's on my mind. ''I guess I am just nervous about tomorrow.'' I say, not wanting to say the event's name out loud.

''Why would you be nervous about tomorrow? I believe you already know what faction you will decide on, am I right?'' Seeing her become angry at the fact that I wasn't answering her question, I nod my head, afraid that will do more to me than just raise her voice. ''I did not catch that, Juliana.''

''Yes Grandma.''

She nods her head before taking my unfinished meal and walking towards the kitchen. Not knowing what to do I stay at the table, my hands playing with the other, my nerves getting the best of me. After a few minutes I decide to walk up to my room, but I am stopped when I hear someone clear their throat behind me. Turning around, I see grandma standing in the door, her arms crossed over her chest, wooden spoon buried in her hand.

''Go get a good night's rest, Juliana.'' She says and I feel honest sincerity in her voice. ''You will have a great day ahead of you, tomorrow.'' I smile at the old lady before I move towards the stairs.

After walking inside my bedroom, I let myself fall onto my bed, not caring that I still had today's clothes on. Today has been exhausting, even if I hadn't been doing too much. A final breath escapes my breath before I am pulled into the land of slumber, where I knew that I did not have to think of the Choosing Ceremony tomorrow.


End file.
